I never ever met my Welsh Grandad. My Welsh Dad met my Son. In 2024 I will become a Grandad, to my Sons’ son. With Gratitude. :),
I never knew either of my Grandads. Both sadly had died before I was born, which is a huge sadness for me, because I would have loved to listen to them and to pass on their history, to my son, Oscar, and to his son, about their lives, and how they fared in Ireland and Wales, during the first and second world war years.
I am very grateful to both of them though, for having lived through their respective time, they created my mum and dad, who through, perhaps also difficult times, and divine grace, gave birth to me, during wartime too. I am a wartime baby, being born in 1944, six months before peace was declared on 8th May 1945.
Luckily I have a picture of my dad’s dad, born in Wales, though not one of my mums’ dad, born in Ireland, which I can show to Oscar. So when Oscars son is born in March 2024, there will be pictures of three generations, of ‘Taids’ born in Wales – my dad and me-, and a Grandad born in Ireland – mums dad.
My mum and dad sadly passed in 1999 and 2000 respectively, though not before meeting my son, and their beautiful grandson Oscar. Now the Hughes family history continues, as Oscar prepares for the birth of his son.
John Hughes – my Welsh Taid (Grandad)
Oscar with his mum, and his Taid (Grandad), in a picture taken at my parents home in 1991
Oscar aged five, with his dad, (me) and his gorgeous mum.
In March 2024, Oscar and his lovely wife Katrina, are expecting their first child, and I will become a first time Taid (Grandad) to their son.
And so the Hughes Family line continues, and in March 2024, I will add pictures of the new member of the Hughes clan.
Lau Tzu said “A leader is best when people barely know he exists, when his work is done, his aim fulfilled, they will say: we did it ourselves”.
Leadership is about behaviour not titles and there are many leadership styles, the seven most common are:
Autocratic – Controlling and directing.
Charismatic – Influential, Inspiring though focussed generally on own Vision
Transformational – Motivating and persuasive though must be present to lead
Participative -. Hands off approach, providing necessary tools to team, does not need to be present though holds responsibility.
Transactional – Delegates based on agreed outcomes and expects members will perform as per agreed outcomes.
Supportive – Delegates, coaches and supports using empathy, compassion and respect.
Democratic – Team shares in decision-making processes and leader encourages discussion and flow of ideas.
All of these styles have benefits and drawbacks.
In Toastmasters ‘Where Leaders are Made’ I have seen all these styles played out in my almost 22 years as a Toastmaster, and I know which styles work best for me.
As I understand it, A Leader has four main functions and they are Direct, Support, Coach and Delegate, and each of these depends on our required outcomes, timeframes, situations, and experience of those we lead. Leaders of course need followers, and if no one follows you as a leader then you are not leading, you are just going for a walk.
To lead well in Toastmasters, we must recognise that the team members are volunteers, as we all are, and therefore consider the four core values of Integrity, Respect, Service and Excellence in all we do, for as Simon Sinek states “We are not in charge but are there to care for those in our charge.
Enjoy your Leadership Roles, identify, train and develop future leaders and enjoy the journey.
My Dad taught me well, encouraged me to be the best I could be. He never told me how to live my married life. He lived his life, and let me watch. Nancy and me, taught Oscar well, and encouraged our son to be the best he could be. He starts his married life tomorrow.
David A Hughes – Oscar’s very proud Dad
THE ATTIC IN MY MIND
There’s an attic up there in my mind where I store the memories, both bitter and sweet. I visit them now and again and examine them just to be sure I can still feel inside as I always have. As I trace the the moments, with my mind, I wonder how my life would have been, if I had chosen a different path than the one, I took back then.
The bitter memories of being born with a congenital condition that was to haunt me in my teenage years, as I reluctantly competed with the handsome guys, to find a girlfriend. The awkwardness of having a squeaky voice and being teased about that by fellow apprentices at my printing college in Liverpool, and the bitter memories when being beaten up by a local ruffian and not being strong enough to defend myself.
I was different and it showed.
At 19 I arrived home from work one evening and my sister had a friend with her. Introducing me, my sister said, ‘this is Pamela she’s a school friend and she wanted to meet you’’, She wanted to meet me, I said; Why?
Pamela told me, it wasn’t how I looked, it was how I behaved and what I said. I was romantic she said, and she liked my singing voice, especially on the phone at night when I sang to her. She said it made her feel special, and that no one else she’d met had made her feel that way. A few months into our courtship she met another guy who made her feel more special, and our courtship ended.
With what I’d learned my confidence started to grow.
One Saturday morning I was walking to the local shop on an errand for my mum, and met Janet, a mate’s friend who had someone with her who was ‘drop dead’ gorgeous. I stopped to chat and to my surprise, Janet said “Oh, Hi David, this is Jenni, she’s my cousin, and I was telling her about you.” I hope you said nice things, I thought, when Jenni smiled a beaming smile and said, “I’m staying with my cousin for a week. It was my lucky day. Jenni and I were together for five years. We were engaged and planning to Marry. It ended a little acrimoniously. I was reckless, and lacked a little empathy then, and along with my stupidity, we broke up, and I ran away, to a new semi-skilled job, working for a telecommunication’s company, based in Kent, UK, to get away from the pain, salve my aching heart, travel throughout Britain, and start a whole new life.
Six months of sorrow
For the next six months I was travelling to many cities and towns installing PABX’s and Channel Carrier equipment to help build the telecommunications network around Britain, ruminating over what may have been, and only getting home to my parents place every couple of weeks.
That six months was a mixture of pure joy and bittersweet moments, as I realised that the love life I had had, fractured as it was, would never mend, and it didn’t!
We both moved on.
Jenni married a policeman she met. I was happy for her, as she’d endured much, and I wished her the very best. As for me, after a couple of years of travelling Britain, working, meeting lots of telephonists and other lovely ladies, having two short and broken relationships, finally met the love of my life in a bar in Edinburgh, Scotland, where we had a whirlwind romance of seven months and married in June 1972, migrated to Australia, adopted a beautiful our child and living an idyllic life, until the heartache of losing my beautiful Nancy, to Cancer, on 29th August 2015.
An Idyllic Life with my Soulmate and Oscars gorgeous Mum
Married for 43 years, living, and loving Nancy was a joyous time. We complemented each other, she with her lust for life and generous soul, and me with my career ambitions, dreams to be the perfect husband and give her all she desired.
We both worked hard, saved, and bought houses, decorated them with precious things and enjoyed each other’s company always, Nancy was more introvert than me, though she enjoyed a good joke, a glass of wine and shopping. She liked to be at home a lot and was a wonderful cook who made the best chips I’ve ever tasted. My Big sister who visited us here twice in Australia, still talks about them. Nancy also was brilliant with crafts and her hobbies provided us with all the creature comforts of the artisan, as she knitted, sewed, planned and interior designed our homes.
Two of her best traits were empathy and compassion for others. She sought justice for the down-trodden, voiced her opinions about political ineptitude, and was never afraid to stand against those she believed to be taking instead of giving. In 1980 she was interviewed and achieved a role as cottage parent in a family group home, looking after six young wards of the state. As a childless couple who had longed to have children of our own, this was to be a wonderful time for both of us.
We lived with the children, and looked after their physical, spiritual, educational, and psychological needs daily, and Nancy was a fabulous carer to each of them. She had realised he true vocation. I worked for Telecom Australia at the time and was delighted to leave and come home to house full of kids and love, each day.
Longing for children of our own
From 1980 and during the 11 years as cottage parents we had tried unsuccessfully to have children of our own, and though we loved the kids we lived with, they weren’t ours, and desperately in 1984 we turned to IVF for three years without success. I still remember those early mornings, the temperature charts, and the drives to Melbourne, hoping against hope that this day would be the day, only to return home bitterly disappointed. Those were three very long years, and still believing we hadn’t reached the stage to give up, we explored child adoption.
Too old to adopt in Australia.
Our ages made us ineligible to adopt in Australia for I was 39 and Nancy 33, though we were told that Overseas adoption was possible at our respective ages.
Overseas adoption is a difficult road.
Knowing that it was possible we applied in 1985 to Community Services Victoria (CSV) to join the overseas adoption program. It was a long road with many, many hurdles, and many disappointments along the process. Endless days of attending meetings with aspiring parents where the social workers-at the time- told of the difficulties of raising children from poor and culturally different countries. There were multitudes of reasons given why we should not continue. Then there were the videos of young children in China and India and Romania, who lived in difficult circumstance in private and state-run orphanages, and were malnourished, disabled, and traumatised.
It was as if we were being discouraged, by our state services to give up. We however remained resolute, didn’t give up and stayed in the process. We asked about adoptions from Central America., and were told there were no programs in these countries nor were any planned,
We were aware that other Countries like UK, Canada, and America had government to government programs with Mexico, Guatemala, and El Salvador, and we researched all of these.
Nancy and I were placed with a group of five other couples who also knew what we knew about such programs, and wanted to adopt from Central America and we worked tirelessly with the department and a couple of adoption agencies to develop a program between CSV and Eliza Martinez state run orphanage in Guatemala City
I was asked to be the spokesperson for the group and to represent them in contacting CSV about our wishes. Dealing with state Departments can be difficult and frustrating, however we never lost sight of our objectives and desired outcomes.
Finally, after five long years of battling the bureaucrats, jumping through many, many hoops, having disaffected social workers replaced, and having a heart-to-heart meeting with the head of CSV, we finally established a program with Guatemala.
In 1990 six files from six childless couples were sent to Eliza Martinez orphanage, and ours (Nany and me) was on the top of the pile.
1991 and dreams do come true.
In May 1991 Nancy and I boarded a jumbo jet in Melbourne to fly on the first leg of a dream trip to meet with the Irma – Director of Hogar Eliza Martinez, fill out agreement papers, attend court in Guatemala City and return with our beautiful now adopted four-year-old bundle of joy; our little Mayan prince, Oscar.
From that day in 1985 when we made our first enquiries to CSV, it had taken six and a half years to fulfil our dream of having children of our own. It was a gruelling six and a half years but oh so worth it.
We arrived in Hogar Eliza Martinez orphanage in the early afternoon and were greeted warmly. The Orphanage Director then spent 30 minutes with us speaking about Oscar and asked us to wait while she went to collect him. As he walked in to meet us, Nancy was so overcome with joy and love, that she sobbed on the shoulders of a friend who was with us, and I bent to say ‘Hola’ and picked him up. We were deliriously happy, and our lives were changed in an instant.
Thirty-Two Years Have Passed
It’s Wednesday 3rd August 2023. Nancy sadly passed on 29 August 2015, Oscar is 36 years old and a fine young man, and I’m in my twilight years. As I sit here on my sofa, Nessa by my side, alone with my thoughts, and having mind-walked down memory lane, I understand that whilst I can remember the past, I don’t wish to dwell there, for the scars of love and loss, are still not fully healed, and I don’t need to be reminded of what might have been, but rather am grateful for what was, what is and what may be.
I’ve had an interesting life and it goes on.
Tomorrow 4th August 2023
There will only be joy and joyful busyness for me today; as I brush and lay out my favourite suit, iron my best shirt, polish my Italian leather boots, prepare for the huge celebratory day, as, gathered together with family, friends and loved ones, at Jackalope Winery, in Red Hill, because our little Mayan prince, Oscar, now all grown up, will marry his sweetheart, Katrina, to live, love, and thrive in what I believe, and fervently hope, will be many joyous and deliriously happy years together.
I’m leaving my attic now to return to this moment. Jenni, my other short live partners, The Printing Trade, Telecommunications, and other memory fragments from the past, can lay in peace now, for they’ll be there in the ‘attic in my mind’ whenever I wish to visit.
With my true soulmate resting warmly in my heart, I’m comfortable, knowing the past choices I made, were the best I could make, at the times I made them.
Right now, though, in this moment, I am listening to Bob Dylan’s, ‘Every Grain of Sand’ “At the time of my confession/in the hour of my deepest need/when the pool of tears beneath my feet/drown every newborn seed/ there’s a crying voice within me/reaching out somewhere….”
I am a product of my existence, a first-born son of my dear departed parents Bill & Margaret, a brother to my siblings Carole, Jacqui, Susan & Mike, Widower, Father to Oscar and future father-in-Law to Katrina. I have survived, and thrived, and life goes on.
The best speakers are not born, they learn, practice, and be
David A. Hughes – icandowords
Often I’m asked how did I develop my speaking and leadership skills, and how long did it take me to reach the level I’m at, and what are the secrets.
My journey to where I’m at has been a long one starting in 1986 and attending Toastmasters has polished the raw skills I had, and now having overcome nervousness, I can confidently engage an audience, with speeches, workshops and seminars. I can also influence others to follow my lead.
A friend once told me that ‘the worst speech you ever give will be better than the one you never give’, and this spurred me on to practice often. Some say, that public speaking is so difficult, yet I find it’s just like telling a story or having a conversation with a group. Let’s face it, as a speaker and presenter, if you want to engage an audience, then it’s important to be credible, be authentic and have a logical structure to your speech or presentation.
The Rhetoricians used Ethos, Pathos and Logos, and if you were to research and practice these three disciplines of a good speech or presentation, you too could be a fine speaker and or presenter.
You have the potential to be a fine speaker, and with knowledge, practice and confidence you might be surprised at how good at it you could be. There are no secrets.
Choose one word only from each group above and place them together into a sentence, and watch the reaction, as your listeners applaud your command of superb business language, even though it’s absolute nonsense.
Some years ago, I showed the BWG to a retiring President of a NGO, and he asked me to write his Retirement Speech and include some of these groups of words. The applause he received at the end of his speech was deafening, with calls of Hear, Hear, throughout, and neither of us revealed that he was speaking gobbledygook at times.
A Sample of part of the NGO Presidents’ speech:
“In my 18 year service with this wonderful organisation, I set out to improve service to our clients by introducing ‘Integrated Monitored Flexibility’ which ensured quality service in a timely manner.
I also encouraged that all staff be trained in ‘Balanced Logistical Programming’, thus ensuring upskilling for all, and after this our organisation became the model of excellence for many of our allied NGO’s, who delivered a similar top quality service, through the implementation of ‘Synchronised Third-generation Mobility.”
He received a Standing Ovation.
Try it now, have fun, and perhaps extend your vocabulary as well
Before today, whenever I searched for a solution to a problem, difficulty or challenge, I would arrive at the solution with a mindset developed or learned from family, Teachers. Leaders, and from personal experience.
After I read Carole Dweck’s ‘mindset’ I realized that my mindset is on a spectrum; fixed at times, growth at times, and somewhere in between at other times.
Now I am concentrating on a growth mindset journey because mindset matters to me.
When I was a child learning my times tables I knew that 5 * 5 = 25 and that was fixed in my brain. When I was a teenager, I knew I could write well, and I did write well. As an employee I worked hard, and as an aged pensioner, as I am today, I receive and am grateful for the benefits.
I had a fortunate life and was satisfied with all of it until I realised it, that everything I knew before this moment, is history, and that I can’t do today’s business with yesterday’s thinking.
For example, when I learned my times table at primary school, I learned that 5 * 5 = 25. Today however, I understand that there are other formulae for reach the number 25. There is 4 * 5 + 5, or 2 * 10 + 5 * 1, or 6 * 3 + 7, and I started writing down all the different solutions to arrive at 25.
Eighty combinations in and I had lots of fun while also learning about myself.
Now I am on the growth mindset journey. Those things, I do well, others not so well, and I realise there are triggers, thoughts and ideas that create within me a need to act, behave and respond the way I do, or more correct to say, I did.
Other things have changed too. Today instead of only using my laptop to produce an outline for a workshop I am putting together, I used my fountain pen, coloured pencils and post-it notes, and really enjoyed the process, even though it took longer than the way I may have done it in the past.
I also will keep on doing this and learn as I go about what makes me tick, what pleases me and what I have fun doing. I will continue to reflect and challenge myself to make my time
Bigger, better, and much more bountiful, so you my family, friends and toastmaster colleagues and guests can reconsider everything you know or believe about me before now.
Visit in your mind and reconsider everything you liked or disliked about me and everything you may have felt about me and now perhaps, see me in a unique way, for the past is exactly, the future is unpredictable, and right now, in this moment, this time, being all we have together, know that I am starting at the point of a journey. Of discovery and exploration; and a journey of engaging deeply and effectively in a learning process.
There is no set end date to my journey. Just, step by step learning, innovating, and collaborating to arrive at a different me.
Last night and early into this morning I joined a Zoom meeting with very good trusted professional speaker friend Yogesh, and met some of his articulate and interesting professional team, including a physicist, a Tony Robbins Certified Coach, and a couple of Life Coaches, who are offering a very reasonably priced 90 Day ‘quantum transformation coaching’ course, which I believe is ideal for anyone wanting to break in to the coaching industry.
I am a Distinguished Toastmaster, communications coach and workshop presenter and use many of the tools offered in the course, in my own everyday small business ‘I Can Do Words’, which I’ve run for 11 years now. My business model, based on Servant Leadership is unique to me, and I am sufficiently well rewarded for my efforts. My main rewards are intrinsic, though I have been blessed to travel widely, presenting both paid and pro bono workshops to audiences in India, Malaysia, UAE, NZ, UK and here in Australia.
We Serve Ourselves Best When We Serve Others
David A Hughes
Consuming we are told is critical for our economy, though connection, giving and sharing, is way more important for our society.
David A Hughes
When Covid and the pandemic are over, and it is safe for me to travel far again, hopefully we can share again, those moments of delight, growth and wonder, once more. Until then, Stay Well, stay Safe and enjoy each moment as it arrives.
In 1986 when I first joined Toastmasters at Frankston Toastmasters Club, I didn’t have any aspirations other than improve my verbal communication, because I spoke much too quickly.
I was a manager in Telecom Personnel at the time, and my senior branch manager suggested that Toastmasters may help me to speak more slowly and with more clarity. He told me Toastmasters was a public speaking organisation, where members practiced, received feedback and with time could become excellent communicators.
With his encouragement, and some trepidation, I visited Frankston Toastmasters Club in July that year and was warmly welcomed. I was allocated a mentor- Bill W-who saw my potential, freely shared his knowledge and convinced me that with time, commitment and regular practice, i could become an excellent communicator and leader.
I stayed at Frankston Club for seven years and during that time, competed in speaking contests, served as a club officer, was an area governor and servant leader. In 1992 I left Toastmasters to raise a family.
Bass Division Table Topics Champion 2017
After a long, long break, and having retired from the paid workforce and started my own businesses, I returned to Toastmasters in July 2008, and can attest that Bill W. was right, for in the past 13 years years I have studied, learned, practiced and presented speeches, workshops, and keynotes for Toastmasters and businesses in Australia, UK, Malaysia, Singapore, India, New Zealand, and the UAE.
Today, I am a grateful speaker, author and servant leader, fully enjoying and embracing quality friends, family and speaking opportunities made possible because a manager and mentor saw my potential all those years ago.
It seems such a long time since I added a post to my blog and so much has happened in the past year or so.
Another birthday, Covid19, a health scare and home renovations to name just a few. My Toastmasters journey continues and for the past few months, everything I do has been on line via zoom.
It’s been 9 months since I’ve travelled to my homes away from home and I miss my friends and family who live a great distance from here.
Now, here in Victoria, Australia, at least, we can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Seven days of zero Covid19 cases and no deaths, and our state is starting to come alive again.
I trust you my friends and readers are staying safe and staying safe. Soon we will get to see each other again and catch up from where we left off. Until that time I wish you all well.
In the past few years, and more particularly in the past twelve months I have reflected on my ‘Six O Clock’ position. “Check Six’ refers to making sure I have situational awareness and know what or who is behind me that could bring me down. Used militarily, when a fighter pilot tells their wingman to “Check Six,” it means to have a look behind you, to see and avoid any threats.
Since a D73 Conference, when I accidentally suffered the first of three really bad falls, hospitalising me and threatening me in this way, I have become more aware of my own fragility, and have needed to create a larger space around me, especially when in a group, for fear of being injured or indeed, injuring others, again.
It is as Analogous to personal space, as it is to all group and organisation situations.
In 1972, Virginia Satir, A family therapist, released her important book titled ‘Peoplemaking, a beautifully readable and good humoured book which described people types, and how they behave in families. It follows therefore if these types are in families, then they are also in organisations, groups, and teams.
She identified five types. Blamer, Distractor, Computer, Placator, and Leveler. Some will know these as the Satir categories, or patterns of communication.
I’d like to believe my default type is Leveler, though I know, that throughout my time, I have moved in and out of all of these, at one time or another, depending on the situation. So now I try hard to focus on only being a Leveler. It isn’t easy and I am not there yet, though doing my best to get there.
In any communication between two or more people, there is a lot going on besides dialogue. There are five sensory inputs, of seeing, hearing, touching, tasting and smelling. (In NLP you will know these as visual, auditory, kinesthetic, gustatory, and olfactory), our thoughts while in communication, our responses to the communication, and, our feelings, before, during and after the communication.
All of these are in the mix, and in any human contact situation, some or all come into play.
So:
If your default is blaming – it can evoke fear, and if I evoke your fear, you might obey me.
If your default is distracting – it can evoke longing for fun, and if I evoke your longing for fun, you might tolerate me.
If your default is Computing – it can evoke envy, and if I evoke your envy, you might ally with me.
If your default is Placating – it can evoke guilt, and if I evoke your guilt, you might spare me. In none of these defaults though can you be loved, or trusted, which in the final analysis, is what makes growth producing relationships.
However, if the default is Leveling – it can evoke trust, and if I can evoke your trust, you will trust me, thus avoiding fear, envy, guilt, and/or the need to only tolerate me. We can then have some fun times in a growth relationship, and drop it into any organisation, and watch as the ripple effect, affects and effects all.
Footnote: Virginia Satir, was on of three therapists who collaborated with Bandler & Grinder, to refine Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP)
The other two therapists were Fritz Perls (Gestalt therapy) and Milton Erickson. (Hypno-therapy)
What happened is a blank to me. I remember arriving home, climbing the steps, and being on the ground, bleeding, in pain and not able to lift myself. The space between is a blank.
“being young, tall and handsome, is a blessed gift, but being aged, mature and mobile, is a work of art”
Luckily, I had my phone and the presence of mind to realise I was in a difficult situation, and called my son, who organised an ambulance and took care of everything until I was installed in the hospital. That was at near midnight on 19th February 2022.
It’s been a long haul. I fractured my knee, that night, and after spending the next 17 days in hospital and in Rehab I was discharged from Rehab on 8th March, only to fall late that evening and break my back. More hospital, Rehab, Weekly Occupational Therapy and Physiotherapy, and finally, today, just three weeks before my 78th Birthday, I can sit without pain, shower without mobility aids, climb stairs without a stick, and stand for more than 30 minutes without needing to sit down.
The relief I feel, that finally I am mobile again, is the best tonic I could receive. 2022 has not been my best year, and I wish it hadn’t happened, however, I have learned that nothing is as important as remaining healthy, fit and as active as possible.
I have learned also, that I am no spring chicken anymore, and as some wag, once said, “being young, tall and handsome, is a blessed gift, but being aged, mature and mobile, is a work of art”
I’ve come a long way in nine months, and am way-more aware now of my abilities, my surroundings and my challenges. So, you will probably see less of me on the physical circuit, see less of me at outdoor events, and less of me travelling to faraway places.
I am not becoming a recluse, nor did I ever feel attracted to a monk’s life, though I am spending my time, doing what I enjoy most, being closer to home.
I have my music, my books, my home and my family and friends. With these I also have my priorities right. Luckily, I can still ‘Zoom’ around the Toastmasters’ and other virtual worlds, which I will continue to do, as long as I am able. For now though I am concentrating on my ‘one day at a time’ routine, of rest, work and a lot less play.
I am beat, though I have had a wonderful day. Rising at 9.00 am today after spending two hours writing and editing 30 pages late into Saturday night and early Sunday Morning, I was finally up and about.
Coffee, and toast. Shower, Check pantry and fridge, and make my shopping list, and head out to explore my world.
Drove down to Tooradin, it isn’t far, just 40kms from home. Surprised I was though to notice fuel prices had jumped. I filled my car on Friday morning at Tooradin and it was $1.77 per litre. Today at the same Service Station it was $2.12 per litre. Must be a holiday coming up. Further up the Tooradin-Baxter Road, In Pearcedale, it was $1.79 per litre.
The sun was shining, weather was warmer, and lots of people in cafes.
I spent some time down by the water, then into my favourite discount book shop looking for reading treasures. I love books and reading.
Leaving Tooradin, drove back to Frankston. The roads are in need of repair, with potholes and water over the road in places. The incessant rain over the past few days has been unkind to the tarmac.
Back in Frankston, I lunches at sushi sushi on three portions of roasted tuna and cucumber, accompanied by orange juice. Then into Aldi for food supplies. From there to the fruit and veg store for all my favourites, and a couple of punnets each of strawberries and blueberries for garnishing my muesli each morning.
Essential shopping completed, I browsed in some clothes shops, though didn’t give way to temptation.
Then a quick trip to chemist warehouse for vitamin D3, to strengthen my bones, after discovering after my recent bone breaking accidents, that I have osteoporosis, and require six-monthly injections of ‘prolia’ with the second one tomorrow at 11.00 am.
Arriving home at 4.00pm, stores all the shopping, made a coffee, wearily sat on my couch, switched on the TV and started to watch ‘Śtep’ a documentary about the senior year of a girls’ high-school step dance team against the background of inner-city Baltimore. Very interesting too.
Then, posed Question 99, of the 100 Day Quiz, I established as an idea, 99 days ago. Wow! Where did the time go, so quickly?
Now it is 5.50 pm, and I am warm, comfy and pleasantly weary. in an hour I will prepare my evening meal, read my new book purchases, write a few more pages, watch some T20 Cricket, then fall into bed, and switch out the lights on what has been a full and most enjoyable day.
Maybe while sleeping, I will have pleasant dreams about all the people, lives, adventures and marvellous experiences, I have been fortunate to enjoy, in what I consider to be my wonderful life, and not at all like the sadness contained in the opening lines of this Jack Clement song.
I could have a mansion, that is higher than the trees, I could have all the gifts I want and never ask please. I could fly to Paris, oh, its at my beck and call. Why do I go through life, with nothing at all? But when I dream, I dream of you. Maybe some day, you will come true.
Growing up as a child I was one of five siblings in a fine Welsh family of seven. Life in Rhosllanerchrugog, Near Wrexham until I was five years old was a lot of fun or so I am told, and as the first born son, to Bill and Margaret Hughes, I was a little spoiled, especially by my Grandma Harriet.
SONY DSCMum and Dad
When in 1949, our family move to Saltney, in Flintshire.
Here we lived in a beautiful semi-detached double storey house, with lovely rooms and a very much lovelier garden. The picture below of me, my older sister Jackie, and little brother Michael, with his puppy, Rusty, was taken in the garden when I was 9 years old. Growing up here was idyllic. Sure it was just a few years after WWII, and we were on rations until 1953 due to food and other material shortages, but I don’t ever remember going hungry.
I went to St. Anthony’s RC School, and later to St. Bede’s RC Secondary School. By all accounts I was a good student, and excelled at arithmetic, and English Literature. I was a boy soprano and loved singing. I also was a very good reader and devoured books of all genres. We had an Encyclopedia set of ‘The World of The Children’ and were encouraged by mum and dad to read daily. This may explain my interest in reading still, and especially writing.
As a teenager, I was like most of my friends, and left school at aged 15, started an apprenticeship in the printing Industry and worked 44 hour weeks for little pay, though managed to enjoy whatever was left after contributing to the family budget. It was enough though to go to movies, treat our girlfriends and when I was 18, a couple of pints at the ‘Corner Pin’ local pub.
In 1969, having an urge to see more of Britain, I left the printing Industry and joined PYE Tmc, as a wireman Installer and travelled the length and breadth of the UK, installing equipment in Telephone Exchanges. Places I had only seen on maps became my workplaces, and adventure places. During the five years I did this, I met my wife to be in Edinburgh, Scotland, married after seven short months, and spent the next 18 idyllic years with my soul mate Nancy, living, loving and travelling. In 1991 we adopted our gorgeous boy Oscar, and for the next 24 years were as happy as any family could be, until sadly Nancy died in 2015, leaving me and Oscar, now a family of two.
Oscar is 35 now, has his own home and recently became engaged to his beautiful partner Katrina. He will now begin the next generation of the Hughes clan, and I am sure his life will be as idyllic as that which me and his mum enjoyed for so long.
Now, today, after growing in a family of seven, all those years ago in my beloved Wales, meeting the love of my life in Scotland in 1971, marrying and leaving my parents home and siblings to migrate across the world, becoming a smaller family of two; and in 1991 having Oscar add to our family to make three, Nancy has passed, Oscar is starting on his own family journey, and I now live alone with Nessa, our faithful pet and my memories.
I was a child who sometimes felt alone, and am now an older man who never feels lonely. For I have my memories, my mates, and my minder.
David A Hughes's Blog 